Brilliant post! I often find my self using this against my partner. How is it fair that every second of my life is with the children until they go to bed. I make a habit of not leaving them. But he has no issue with creating “his man time” he often breaks away twice a week to play golf, golf takes four hours, we have worked it out with plenty of practice. Then there’s his garden time, he’s only 28 seriously we could get a gardener no problem. I would prefer it. A viable expense, just some small upkeep to increase the family time we get. However I think he likes the quiet time. He thinks he’s Alan Titchmarch and he definitely isn’t! He doesn’t go to to pub very often but it’s more than me. His rebuttal is that well I get to go out and be social all week so it’s not fair. Well sweetheart I never leave without the kids so I’m not getting a break. Not that I want a break I would just love to know how men can be so blasé and guilt free about alone time. In fact I may have to book myself a spa day. Even then I know I’ll be texting every five minutes on how they both are so it’s my own fault.
In those first few months of parenthood neither of us knowing what we were doing. Our ideas and ideals were soon after assaulted by stark realities . . . remember vowing that an Exersaucer would never replace a coffee table? Swearing that you’d never talk about your child’s poo over a romantic dinner? Insisting that your children will never be placated by the television? Yep. Those ideals.
We were learning from each other. Our mid-day phone calls were no longer about the new hot spot where we needed to make dinner reservations, but about discussing projectile vomit and the number of hours a small baby could possibly scream at the top of their lungs before I would need to be committed. As the years pass we’re still learning from each other and while the themes of these calls have changed the message remains the same: we are a team that…
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